- Bart Simpson: I want a father that's the same at night as he is at day... eh... what's the word for that...
Todd Flanders: Consistency?
Bart Simpson: Yeah. Thanks loser. - Ned Flanders: Thank you, Lord, for this bountiful… [screams]
Ned Flanders: PENIS!
Flanders' kids: [devoutly] Thank you, Lord, for this bountiful penis. - Homer Simpson: [while choking Bart for laughing at him] I'll teach you to laugh at something that's funny!
- Marge Simpson: Go out there and face that mob!
Homer Simpson: But I'm afraid if I do, they'll kill you.
Carl: No we won't, we just want Homer.
Homer Simpson: But they might kill Grandpa.
Grampa: I'm part of the mob! - Montgomery Burns: Smithers... I've never believed in suicide, but... it might cheer me up to watch you do it.
- EPA Official: You've gone mad with power!
Russ Cargill: Of course I've gone mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It's boring and no one listens to you! - Ned Flanders: The Good Lord is telling me to confess to something...
Homer Simpson: Gay Gay Gay Gay Gay Gay Gay - President Schwarzenegger: I was elected to *lead*, not to *read*.
- Bart Simpson: Don't shoot! If you kill my dad, you'll never know where the treasure is buried.
Russ Cargill: What treasure?
Bart Simpson: The treasure of Ima Wienner.
Russ Cargill: I'm a wienner? [Homer and Bart laugh]
Homer Simpson: Classic. - Bart Simpson: [on the blackboard, in the open sequence] I will not illegally download this movie.
Lamest:
Homer Simpson: [singing Tune to Spider-Man Theme Song] Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig. / Does whatever a Spider-Pig does. / Can he swing / from a web? / No he *can't*, / he's a pig. / Look out! / He is the Spider-Pig!
Best:
Russ Cargill: Anyone can just pick things. It takes real leadership to pick something you're clueless about.
President Schwarzenegger: Ok, I pick 3!
Russ Cargill: Try higher.
President Schwarzenegger: 5!
Russ Cargill: Lower.
President Schwarzenegger: 1?
Russ Cargill: Higher.
President Schwarzenegger: 3?
Russ Cargill: You said 3.
President Schwarzenegger: 6?
Russ Cargill: There is no 6.
President Schwarzenegger: 2?
Russ Cargill: Double it.
President Schwarzenegger: 4!
Russ Cargill: As you wish, sir.
Theres another 1 I really liked. I think it was somthing like
Police Officer: [points at dead body] I thought that was a dead body.
Police Chief: That's what I thought too before he said it was lawn trimmings. You really should learn to listen. XD
That's about it I guess. The rest of the movie was really full of dumb crap "jokes". =.=
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